October 20, 2017 ·
DeAngelo Wiser
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Uncategorized
DeAngelo Wiser
We see a lot of happy teams and coaches celebrating championships on social media, but how about those on the other end of the scoreboard? What was their reaction in a big game?
We often see players crying and expressing a wide range of emotions, but how about the coach or coaches? They do their best to stay strong and care for their players during this tough time, but for how long after that final horn? What’s next for them?
So I ask, how will you handle a season-ending loss? I’m not talking about your players or addressing your team. How do you personally deal with it? Many coaches have shared with me it’s one of the toughest times of the season, and through my own coaching experience I can agree fully.
Everything comes to a screeching halt. No more practices to plan. No more bus requests. No more interviews, no more games, no more demands. As coaches, we all thrive on demands and challenges. Days off or the end of the season are tough. So what now?
For most of us, it’s like a heavy fog has moved in and the coaching energy has dissipated. Often we head down that “should have, could have, what if road.” You know the one. That imaginary dirt road littered with dusty championship trophies that have our team’s name on them. It’s also the one where you beat yourself up with thoughts of, “did we really lose?… what if that goal had gone in? … I should have made this adjustment,” etc. And the one thought we can’t get out of our heads is, “I’ve let my team down.”
It’s something we all do, but it’s wasted energy draining our ability to function.
So can we avoid this situation completely? I don’t think so. If the game and your team mean anything to you, you’ll have these thoughts when you lose to end the season, and need time to sort it all out. The better question may be, “What can I do to reduce the time I feel this way?”
Many coaches take vacations directly after the season to completely get away and recharge their batteries. Personally I’ve found you can’t escape those emotions and thoughts for a while, regardless if you’re half way around the world.
So here are my suggestions:
ROUTINE
Looking that loss right in the eye may be your best therapy. You’ll find top level coaches in their office the next day after their season ends. In their view, it serves no purpose to feel sorry for yourself or your team. After all, you’re the leader and you have to remain strong even when it’s tough. It doesn’t mean the loss doesn’t hurt. It’s just their way of competing against it. Keeping a routine even when the season ends is one of the best things you can do. It gives you purpose and hope for next season. You certainly won’t have as much to do as you would if you were still playing, but it’s enough to get you through this tough time. Take the time you would be practicing and work on next season.
PLANNING
Take what you learned from the loss and use it to your advantage in planning practice sessions and what you want to accomplish next year. Work on your schedule. Plan your own camps or team camps your team will attend. Add some variety to your schedule such as a weekend trip against some top teams. Research some new team building activities for ropes courses, or white water rafting. Also, think about some Friday night cookouts. These will bring a smile to your face as you think about all the players you have coming back, and what your team can accomplish.
FEED YOUR PASSION
Attend as many clinics, conventions or residential courses as possible. If you haven’t already, plan on starting or achieving the highest level license or diploma in your sport. Spending time with your colleagues will teach many lessons, such as that all coaches experience setbacks and wonderful moments. It’s also a great time to share strategies and ideas that have worked or failed miserably. Your passion batteries will be recharged in this setting, and, more importantly, you’ll see you’re not alone in anything you’ve experienced.
PROMOTE/ASSIST
Set up speaking engagements with your local organizations promoting your program and get your team involved with charity events or businesses that need volunteers to assist those in need. Nothing shows us how un-important winning or losing a game is than seeing those who need our help and the joy or smiles we see. The lessons learned in this setting will last you and your players a lifetime.
MEET WITH YOUR TEAM
Meet with your team as soon as possible with the plans you have for next season. They also will be experiencing a range of emotions from the season ending. Let them plan or create some of the activities for next year. They need a sense of purpose and relief as well. Talk with the young players you’ve recruited or who are in the feeder system of your program. Let them know how excited you are about them joining your team.
VACATION
I know, I know. I said earlier you can’t escape the emotions of losing after the season. I still stand behind that statement, but the key is the timing. Wait until you’ve established somewhat of a routine and gotten over the sting. You’ll enjoy your vacation with those who care about you most when the dust has settled, and you’re thinking about next season with a smile and all the possibilities.
Every coach is different. We all have to deal with that season ending loss in our unique way. None of us wants it to happen, and it’s hard not to take it personally. Often our players have no idea the anguish we feel at that moment. But just like our players, we are resilient, we just don’t bounce back as quickly.
Experience can help in those situations, but it’s not a cure. There aren’t any quick fixes or solutions, just the knowledge that we’ll get through it. Getting back up and into your routine will lead you to a renewed passion for next season. That energy will come back strong as you realize you have the greatest job in the world!
Keep inspiring. Your players are counting on you.
October 5, 2017 ·
DeAngelo Wiser
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Uncategorized
DeAngelo Wiser
wisersportsleadership.com
What exactly is a hungry team and what does it look like? Are we able to recognize it? Have you shared the term and concept with your team?
We know that great talent trumps average talent most of the time, but what about teams that are evenly matched? We hear a lot about one team out working or being more determined than the other, and that’s how they come out on top. Where does that determination originate? Is it the personality of the team, the leader, their work ethic in practice or an obsession with what they are determined to accomplish?
I believe it comes from a deep-rooted hunger driven by many factors. Have you witnessed a game where one team seems totally committed to winning every 50/50 ball, every ball out of the air and plays with reckless abandon? Where does that drive come from? Is it a natural trait in some players? Why doesn’t every team have it or play this way?
Teams can often become content simply staying where they are with no drive or hunger to accomplish more, regardless of our efforts. Why is that? Often it’s what we allow them to do, giving in to mediocrity and comfort. Plus some players may not want to pay the price for attempting greatness knowing how much effort is required or the heartache if they come up short.
Why should they be hungry? We live in a society where compliments and encouragement dominate even when not merited while reality and honest appraisal are frowned on for potentially hindering self-esteem. As a coach we need to know which players have or are capable of developing hunger. Why? They’re the foundation of what we want to build and possibly the leaders we need to push us to greatness.
How can we create and develop a hunger in our team? Let’s look at some ideas:
1. Culture- Create a culture where losing without complete effort isn’t comfortable or accepted. A price must be paid for losing in competitive activities in practice. Not demeaning, just demanding. Build a practice environment that carries over to the game. Players need to learn that losing isn’t fun.
2. Bad losses- If your team played poorly or needs motivating, keep reminders of what they gave up or the score of a bad loss in the locker room. Hungry players won’t like it and will be motivated to prove doubters wrong. Avoid making excuses for the team and own it.
3. Benefits- Can you convey to your players why they should work hard to achieve greatness? Many have no clue what greatness is. Can you paint a picture or bring in others who have been there? Hold that vision up every day.
4. Reward- Highlight players who embrace hunger. Reward their determination. They may or may not have the talent of other players, but they represent what you’re building and want to see.
5. Model Relentlessness- Be relentless with every aspect of your coaching. Hunger starts with you. Set the standard and model it. When you’re satisfied with less than the best, your players will be as well. Keep your hunger burning bright as an example for your players. There will be days when it won’t be easy, but it will be worth it.
6. Honest/Real- Be upfront with players concerning their performance and efforts. If they aren’t carrying their weight they need to know it. If they need to sit out a game or lose their starting position, take care of it. When you talk with under performing players do it in a professional manner in your office away from the rest of the team.
7. Warriors- Designate one or two practices a week for 1 V 1 or 2 V 2 wars. When you establish an environment where players are competing against each other with a price for losing, you’re building hunger. You’ll readily see the warriors on your team, and their fire must spread to the rest of the team.
8. Adversity- Take your team to a homeless shelter or bring in a guest speaker who is battling adversity. Let them see what real, everyday hunger is, the ability to survive or the effort it takes to get through a day. They need to know what you’re asking is possible and how blessed they are to be able to attempt it.
9. Championship Venue- If you didn’t reach the championship game, take your team to see what it’s like. They need to experience all the fans, the glitz and glamour, the recognition the players receive and the jubilation of the winning team. Hopefully the experience will build hunger in your team to reach this level of greatness. They need to also know that teams that win it all will always be remembered and their legacy celebrated with reunions. If all else fails, show them a championship ring and remind them how good it would look on them.
You come to work every day with a hunger to lead your team to greatness. Frustration can grow when you don’t see the same hunger or drive in your team. How can they possibly know if they haven’t experienced it? Never stop sharing your vision of what hunger looks like.
It will take every ounce of energy you have, every moment of maintaining composure and the ability to make tough decisions to build a hunger in your team. Does it mean you’ll win a championship? No, but your team will know they gave it all they had every day, and left it all on the field. It won’t be easy, but it will be worth it.
I wish you and your team the best in the post season!
September 14, 2017 ·
DeAngelo Wiser
·
Uncategorized
DeAngelo Wiser
I’ve made a lot of mistakes over my career, but the great thing about it is, I’ve learned from every one of them. It’s how we all learn–through experience. Simply said, if you aren’t making mistakes, you’re not trying to do something new and challenging.
Our players are the same way. They make mistakes throughout a game. As coaches, we can usually trace unfavorable performances to a series of mistakes over the course of a game. You just hope that one of them isn’t the obvious deciding factor in a game.
NEVER LET A MISTAKE BREAK YOUR SPIRIT………..
We were in the final eight of the state playoffs, doing our best to break through to the final four, where we had never been. Our path had been cleared, no perennial powerhouse in our way as in previous years. Our opponent was an excellent team, ranked in the top 10, but a mental roadblock had been lifted from our players’ minds when our more feared adversary lost. This would be our best chance at achieving our goal.
We lost our goalkeeper in a freak accident before the playoffs began, but we didn’t lose a step as we captured the district and regional titles. One of our field players, who also played softball, stepped in the frame. She was doing an excellent job, although lacking the decision making experience we needed this time of year in big games. That concerned me.
What a great match up this game turned out to be. They were pushing forward with numbers and attacking our goal, and we were counter attacking with our speed. On one of their runs they sent a ball into a crowded box. Naturally our new keeper wanted to hug her line rather than go to the ball. When that happened one of our defenders tried to clear the ball out, but her body was angled toward the goal, and when she didn’t get her hips turned, she knocked it in the goal. Our team looked on in disbelief. The player hung her head and was in tears.
But there was still time left in the first half, no time to get down or dwell on what we couldn’t control at this point. We had to regroup, refocus and play on. That would be easier said than done. For the next few minutes the halftime horn couldn’t sound quickly enough. After defending out-of–our-mind for the remainder of the half, we escaped with the score still 1-0.
I did the best I could to console and let our player know that she had done all she could, and we needed her focused for the second half to pull this game out. Her teammates did the same. We talked about areas we could exploit the next half, and what we could improve on.
The second half was tremendous for us. We did all we could to score, and our defenders kept them out of the goal. However it wouldn’t be enough as the score ended up 1-0. After the game I did my best to talk with our team, consoling each player, and especially our player who had made the mistake, explaining that we wouldn’t even have been in this game without her, but I knew it wasn’t enough.
Nothing you can say can make the pain and realization go away. I’m thankful this particular player had a strong family who could handle this in a positive and loving manner.
In our game, mistakes happen in rapid fire succession. Some players pause or get frustrated, and, by the time they snap back, the ball is gone and the chance to win it back has disappeared. It’s not the mistake that’s crucial, it’s how you deal with it that’s important. The sooner you can let the mistake go, and refocus on what needs to be done next, the sooner you’ll be successful. Great players do this automatically.
I once heard the analogy of a fighter pilot who, while flying missions, barely clipped some small trees, causing no damage. Traveling at tremendous speed, he had no time to dwell on that situation because it was gone and now other obstacles and challenges were in front of him. If his focus had been on that mistake, he surely would have crashed.
As coaches we have to teach our players how to deal with mistakes.
1. Mistakes are a natural part of any game.
2. Don’t take mistakes personally.
3. Getting frustrated hurts you and your team.
4. Showing frustration helps the opposition.
5. There’s no time to dwell on mistakes during a game.
6. Play thru the mistakes as if they never happened.
7. React immediately in a determined manner and move on.
8. Talk positively to yourself.
9. After the game evaluate your performance.
What about the coach on the sideline? Have you witnessed a game in which the goalkeeper gave up an easy chance, the other team scored, and the coach lost his or her composure? When that happens we forever alter the path that our players take. Some may leave the game entirely, while others will always want to play it safe and never take chances for fear of your or another coaches’ wrath. We need to recognize those situations and do our best to control our emotions.
How can we improve our reaction to mistakes as coaches:
1. Players are the first to know they made a mistake. They don’t need a loud reminder.
2. Be aware of negative body language on the sideline. Throwing your hands in the air, putting your hands in your face, or simply refusing to look their way says more than any words could ever say.
3. Encourage your players, even if it’s tough in a difficult situation. They need your support then more than ever.
4. If possible, don’t pull them immediately out of the game. It magnifies the mistake and situation. If you feel you must make a change, try to do it after several minutes when the mistake has died down.
5. When you have the time to talk with them, let them tell you what happened before you say anything. I guarantee they knew the right thing to do, but just didn’t do it.
6. If it’s a traumatic mistake or a game winner for the other team, show your support in a caring manner. There are no magic words in those situations. They need to know you still believe in them.
When you watch successful teams, you soon notice that the ability to play through mistakes is obvious. On some nights the mistakes are more numerous than others, but their demeanor and mission is the same–to stay focused on winning the ball and the game.
As coaches, we have control over our players’ reaction to mistakes. We often lose sight of this vital aspect of the game in a rush to work on technique and tactics in practice. Take the time today to stop play when a situation presents itself in which a player reacts positively to a mistake. The picture you paint may make a difference in your season.
I wish you and your team the best!
